Since it’s April Fools’ Day, I thought I’d have a little fun by putting the 2016 Republican presidential race into some perspective. By that I mean, I thought I’d list 10 moments from the race thus far that are so ridiculous they seem like they could be an April Fools’ joke – but they actually happened.
I know I’m going to forget several. Let’s be honest, the 2016 Republican presidential race has been one of the most embarrassing moments in American history.
So, with that said (in no particular order), let’s get to it.
1. Donald Trump announced his candidacy by descending down an escalator to a podium where he called most Mexican immigrants rapists and criminals.
2. Mike Huckabee said during a speech that he would have been “transgender” in high school if it would have allowed him to shower with girls.
3. Jeb Bush criticized President Obama for being too intelligent – no, seriously, he did.
4. Ted Cruz released a campaign video where he supposedly fried bacon on the barrel of an assault rifle called “machine gun bacon.”
5. When asked about a recent school shooting in Oregon, Jeb Bush tried to discourage Americans from jumping to conclusions on what we should do about gun violence because “stuff happens.”
6. Even though it never happened, and there’s literally not a second of news footage that exists to suggest that it did, Donald Trump stated that he witnessed “thousands and thousands” of Muslims celebrating in the streets of New Jersey on 9/11 – but the news networks were concealing the proof to be politically correct.
7. Ben Carson, apparently in an effort to make himself sound tougher, essentially bragged about trying to assault his mother with a hammer and stabbing one of his childhood friends.
8. Donald Trump releases his “medical report” that was written so comically it literally said Trump would be “the healthiest person ever elected to the presidency,” his stamina was “extraordinary” and his laboratory test results were “astonishingly excellent.”
9. During a Republican presidential debate in early March, the topic of the size of Donald Trump’s hands was brought up that ultimately led to the current presidential frontrunner for the GOP nomination bragging about the size of his penis on live television.
10. On Wednesday, Donald Trump publicly professed his belief that if there’s ever a ban on abortions, but women find a way to have one anyway, they should be “punished.” The uproar over this comment was so quick and fierce that almost instantly Trump backtracked on the comment, saying doctors, not the women themselves, would be the ones “punished” for performing an abortion.
Again, I know I’m missing a lot of these embarrassing moments. Such as Trump mocking a reporter with disabilities, Marco Rubio giving a speech following his third place finish in Iowa that sounded like he had just won the presidency, or Ted Cruz defending the endorsement of a blatantly anti-Semitic pastor. This race has been so outrageous I don’t even look forward to watching the news anymore because it seems more like some weird, perverted version of political reality TV than actual coverage of a presidential race happening in the most powerful nation on Earth.
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