Most of us know that conservatives are professional conspiracy theorists. In the past I’ve joked that they must really believe President Obama is the most powerful president in United States history considering the amount of conspiracies they’ve alleged he’s successfully perpetrated.
But conspiracy theorists always make me laugh because they believe all of these asinine things, yet none of them ever come to fruition. Not one time do these people ask themselves, “Maybe the people I trust have been lying to me?”
I’m still waiting for President Obama to make this massive push to confiscate everyone’s guns. After all, isn’t that what the NRA has said he’s planned to do since he was elected? Well, as we all know, that hasn’t happened (and it won’t). But I’ll tell you what has happened. Every single time the NRA and their conservative puppets start pushing these conspiracies about guns, gun and ammo sales skyrocket. But I’m sure there’s absolutely no link between massive gun manufacturers’ support of the NRA and their irrational fear mongering about gun confiscation that always leads to a spike in gun and ammo sales.
What about those microchip mandates in the Affordable Care Act? Anyone been microchipped yet? Anyone? Bueller? Didn’t think so.
Speaking of the Affordable Care Act, when do those “death panels” start forming? Anyone have any families members serving as “Dr. Death” on President Obama’s death panels?
I’m still waiting for that massive wave of socialism, too. Or communism. Or fascism. Apparently conservatives think all three of these terms are interchangeable even though they’re different ideologies.
Then there’s always the jobs report released every month. If it’s positive, it’s because President Obama altered the numbers. If it’s bad, it proves Obama’s economic policies don’t work. I’ve never quite figured out how a set of numbers, from the same source, can represent two completely conflicting things depending on if the numbers are good or bad.
Speaking of the economy, when will “Obamacare” kill jobs? We’re now what, over 4 years of consecutive private sector job growth? That means out of Obama’s five-plus-years in the White House, 80% of it we’ve had private sector job growth. And then there’s that little side note about stocks setting multiple record highs.
And don’t give me the nonsense of, “Well the jobs created have been low paying and underemployment is rampant!” If that’s your argument, considering the rich are doing great and corporations are recording massive profits, then you’re essentially admitting trickle-down economics doesn’t work.
By the way, when will that wealth start to “trickle down”? The wealthy have been doing great for over thirty years now, yet the poor and middle class continue to fall further and further behind.
Then there’s always Benghazi. The never-ending conspiracy theories that have been reduced down to (because they’ve all been debunked) the “talking points” used the weekend following the attack. Republicans have managed to turn a tragedy in Benghazi into a punchline for a joke where no matter what’s going on in your life, just blame Benghazi. After all, there doesn’t seem to be an issue that’s gone on in this country recently where the conservative media hasn’t somehow tied it in with Benghazi.
Then there’s always the usual Obama’s not actually an American; he’s really a Muslim; he’s working with the Muslim Brotherhood; he’s training his own private army; he’s altered the Affordable Care Act numbers; he’s controlling the media – honestly I’ve forgotten more of these conservative conspiracy theories than I can remember. The list seems endless.
But over and over again conservatives churn out more and more of these asinine conspiracies and I just have one question to ask them, “When will even one actually come true?”
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