As many of you have heard, there’s currently an ongoing dispute between Dish Network and Fox News. These kinds of disputes are nothing new and they always boil down to money. Of course, this is only temporary. It’s just a matter of time before one side caves and Fox News is back on Dish Network spewing their special brand of ignorance and misinformation.
But in the meantime Dish Network did expose Fox News as nothing more than right-wing propaganda by temporarily replacing the channel with Newsmax and Glenn Beck’s The Blaze in the same channel tier.
Of course to most conservatives, not even those ultra loony right-wing channels can possibly replace Fox News. So I thought I’d offer my own list of 5 channels conservatives who subscribe to Dish Network can watch to try to fill that empty hole left when their favorite conservative entertainment channel was taken off the air.
1. SyFy: Since millions of conservatives believe that dinosaurs and humans once walked alongside one another, I figure many of them must be huge fans of science fiction. And I’m sure they show the Jurassic Park movies on the network once in a while.
2. The Weather Channel: Apparently many conservatives don’t understand the difference between weather and climate. Good news! There’s an entire network that’s on the air 24 hours a day that can teach them the difference between the two and explain that just because it’s cold outside, that doesn’t mean climate change isn’t real.
3. Comedy Central: More specifically The Daily Show. While watching Jon Stewart isn’t the same as watching Sean Hannity, he does cover a lot of what’s said on Fox News – just without all of the lies, propaganda and b.s. And hey, if you pay close enough attention, you might even learn a few things while watching.
4. NASA Television: Since many conservatives seem to believe that the Earth is only 6,000-years-old, I think it might be beneficial for conservatives to learn a thing or two from NASA about the vastness of space. That way these people who think the planet is only a few thousand years old can realize just how absolutely stupid that is.
5. CMT: With quality and educational shows like Redneck Island, Party Down South, Swamp Pond, Swamp Hunters, Dog and Beth: On the Hunt and what seems like an endless supply of Cops: Reloaded, this just seems like a channel tailor-made for Southern conservatives. And I would be absolutely stunned if they didn’t show The Beverly Hillbillies movie from time to time.
Well, there you have it folks. I’m just one progressive trying to help my conservative counterparts who subscribe to Dish Network fill the giant void that I know they’re currently experiencing.
If anyone else has any suggestions, please hit me up on Twitter and share your ideas. If this contract dispute goes on for too much longer I might need to make a longer list next time.
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