Here’s a List of Really Stupid Things That Offend Republicans More Than The Confederate Flag

obama-golfingAs I’m sure almost everyone has noticed, since the tragic shooting that left nine African-Americans dead in Charleston, South Carolina there’s been a heated debate over the Confederate flag and the fact that it still flies at the State House.

I really can’t believe that in 2015 not only are we still having a debate over whether or not a flag that represents treason, slavery and racism does, indeed, represent those things – but that it actually still flies in front of one of our government buildings.

Even if you want to ignore all the aspects of slavery and racism that are tied to the Confederacy, the bottom line is these people were traitors who attacked a U.S. military base. To fly that flag on any government property is completely asinine.

Well, as most would expect, there’s been plenty of ignorance shown by quite a few conservatives (especially Southern ones) over their delusions that this flag doesn’t represent racism, but rather “their heritage.” It’s amazing what people will convince themselves of to avoid facing the reality that they’ve been showing honor to a symbol of hate.

And even in the face of one of the most heinous acts of racial hatred we’ve seen in quite some time, many Republicans continue to defend this flag and seem unable to get why anyone would be offended by it. I’m not sure if it’s willful stupidity or pandering to their voters, but it’s been comical for me to watch conservatives act befuddled that people might be offended by this flag. Especially considering the stupid things conservatives get offended by on a nearly constant basis.

So, in that spirit, I thought I’d list a few of the idiotic things conservatives have been “offended” or “outraged” by, as many of those same conservatives continue to act “shocked” that anyone would find the Confederate flag offensive.

The “War on Christmas”: We all know this one. It’s hyped every single November for whatever reason and it’s based on absolutely no facts whatsoever. Basically it’s conservatives who don’t like the fact that religion is being kept out of places it doesn’t belong. But nonetheless, every year millions of conservatives are “offended” by something that doesn’t even exist.

Happy Holidays: This goes along with the made up “war on Christmas.” If you dare tell a conservative “Happy Holidays,” you might just get an angry and hostile “Merry Christmas!” back in disgust to confirm that you totally just ruined their day. Because, you know, this matters.

Gay Marriage: It’s amazing how millions of conservatives seem to think people they don’t know getting married is somehow going to impact their lives. Gay marriage could become legal right this second and you know what would change in the lives of these people? Absolutely nothingThey’re “offended” that two men or two women might dare get married because they disagree with “that lifestyle.” As if millions of gay Americans are supposed to care about what individuals they don’t know, and will likely never meet, think about who they are.

Any Mention of Gun Regulations: If you even hint at pushing for legislation that would require universal background checks or longer wait periods on guns, most conservatives will lose their damn minds. Meanwhile, these regulations would not prevent a single law-abiding citizen from getting a gun, yet may prevent some who shouldn’t have a gun from getting one.

The “War on Christianity”: Here’s another made-up bunch of nonsense by people who are “offended” by the fact that they’re being prevented from unconstitutionally forcing their religious views on others. Meanwhile, there’s absolutely no one telling them they can’t be Christian, can’t go to church or anything of that nature. They’re free to be as religious as they want to be – just as long as they don’t try to force that religion on others, which is what they constantly try to do.

Gay Wedding Cakes: Yes, there are millions of people who find it “offensive” that a business might be forced to mix flour, water and sugar together to make a dessert that ultimately ends up at a wedding where two people of the same-sex get married.

President Obama’s Golfing: Amazing to think that a president taking a few hours a week to go golfing “offends” so many conservatives… but a flag used by the Ku Klux Klan, white supremacists and the biggest treasonous uprising in our nation’s history doesn’t.

Voter Fraud: Despite the fact that an extensive investigation found 31 credible cases of voter fraud out of one billion votes cast since 2000, millions of conservatives are so “offended” that there’s a 0.0000031% chance that someone might commit voter fraud that Republican lawmakers all across the country have acted swiftly to “combat this serious threat to our nation.”

The Death of “Traditional American Values”: What the hell does this even mean? When exactly did this nation develop a set of “traditions” we were supposed to follow? Once upon a time slavery, denying women the right to vote and segregation were “traditional American values” and I’m sure many racists and bigots at the time were “offended” when an end was put to those traditions as well.  This nation has always been – and will always be – about progress. It’s just that our history shows that progress is often stalled by some of the most ignorant among us.

I’ll go ahead and cut if off there, though there are plenty more. So, while conservatives are a group of people who seem to be “offended” by a large list of absolutely pointless nonsense, millions of those same people just can’t seem to grasp why so many find a flag that flew over armies that defended slavery offensive.

Feel free to hit me up on Twitter and let me know what you think.

Allen Clifton

Allen Clifton is a native Texan who now lives in the Austin area. He has a degree in Political Science from Sam Houston State University. Allen is a co-founder of Forward Progressives and creator of the popular Right Off A Cliff column and Facebook page. Be sure to follow Allen on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to his channel on YouTube as well.


Facebook comments

  • DAV

    OK, I’ll hit the easy ones first: The “War on Christmas” and the “War on Christianity” “Gay Wedding Cakes” and “Happy Holidays” to fundamentalist “Christians” not being able to force others to follow their beliefs is persecution. Their whole system of belief is based on forcing everyone to do as they say and to try to prevent this is infringing on their “freedom”. It is literally destroying them not to be in charge of everyone else’s lives.

    President Obama’s golf? Black man on golf course – that slams their racist philosophies badly in the first place, and then that Black Man is President of the United States – they cannot stand it.

    “Traditional American Values” – well ‘Once upon a time slavery, denying women the right to vote and segregation were “traditional American values”’, and they want to return to those days. They desperately want to return to those days because then they didn’t have to worry about being educated, capable, skilled or anything else they just had to be white men. Now society makes too many demands on them – they have to compete with women and minorities for for jobs, and status. That is clearly unfair and returning to the standards of the 1950s where women shut up and did and they were told and minorities keep out of the way is they only way these “conservatives” can see to get back on top.

    • Paul Hayward

      Your description of “traditional American values” indicates either a complete lack of awareness as to what they actually were OR a propensity to cherry pick issues in order to evade the actual subject presented….. slavery, segregation, and women’s voting rights were issues of a time past, NOT traditional American values. I find it amusing how some of today’s “enlightened” commentators teeter precariously close to the borderline of bigotry and discrimination with their casting down of an entire body of the population (because they are conservative) with cries of “They” and “Them” as being intelectually and morally inferior. This is Modern Bigotry as it finest – just as morally and intellectually deficient as ANY bigotry ALWAYS IS.

      • volkerball85

        “This is Modern Bigotry as it finest – just as morally and intellectually deficient as ANY bigotry ALWAYS IS.”

        The intolerance of intolerance is not intolerance. If Conservatives don’t like being called stupid, all they have to do is stop acting the part.

  • Leah Schultz

    They don’t have a problem with the flag because bigots don’t think they are bigots.