Jon Stewart Destroys Alabama’s Biblical Hypocrisy: ‘You Have F**ked Yourselves With Your Own Statute!’ (Video)

jon-stewart-alabamaI was talking with a buddy of mine yesterday about gay marriage and how I cannot wait for the conservative freakout when the Supreme Court rules that bans on same-sex marriage are unconstitutional, thus legalizing same-sex marriage on a national scale. It’s going to be epic and hilarious – and a long time coming.


Though I think the saddest part is, even though it’s clear that same-sex marriage is soon to become legal everywhere in the United States, millions of conservatives still think they’re going to “win” this battle. When a judge in Alabama (who was appointed by George W. Bush) rules that the ban on same-sex marriage in the state is unconstitutional – you lost.

Well, last night Jon Stewart went off on the continued conservative homophobia by talking about Kansas Governor Sam Brownback’s decision to legalize discrimination against members of the LGBT community in his state and Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore’s order to probate judges to ignore the federal ruling overturning the state’s ban on gay marriage.

“It being Kansas, I guess Brownback clicked his heels three times and said, ‘There’s no place like homophobia,’” Stewart said.

Though Alabama was the main focus of Stewart’s ire, as he mocked the state for being just as ignorant about equal rights now as they were in the 60’s during the Selma to Montgomery marches.

He then played a clip of a local probate judge saying his court would no longer perform marriages due to their deeply held religious beliefs.

Stewart pointed out one huge problem with these judges who are refusing to perform same-sex marriages due to their Christian beliefs – the voters of Alabama overwhelmingly passed Amendment 1 (otherwise known as the anti-Sharia law bill) that prohibits the implementation of any ruling based on “foreign law.”

“Where was the Bible written again? Last time I checked, ancient Galilee is not one of the 50 states. Or even one of them territories that nobody knows about. Which makes it foreign law,” Stewart said. “The kind of foreign law you’d explicitly banned from judicial decisions. You have f*cked yourselves with your own statute.”


And he’s absolutely right. For all intents and purposes, Christianity is every bit a “foreign” religion as Islam. Just because Christianity is the dominant religion in this country doesn’t mean that the religion is from here. The religion was around long before the United States ever existed. So, in reality, Alabama’s Amendment 1 makes any laws based upon Christianity illegal. Though as we all know, Amendment 1 was nothing more than the citizens of Alabama (who watch entirely too much Fox News) voting for something to prevent “Sharia law from taking over” – even though our Constitution prohibits laws based on religion.

But if you want to get literal about Amendment 1, because Christianity is not from here (meaning that it’s foreign), any laws in the state based upon its beliefs became illegal the moment the bill passed.

The truth is, any laws based upon Christian beliefs are illegal regardless of if you believe Christianity is foreign or not. And it’s not because Amendment 1 says they are, it’s because our Constitution gives us that guarantee.

Watch the segment below via Comedy Central:




Allen Clifton

Allen Clifton is a native Texan who now lives in the Austin area. He has a degree in Political Science from Sam Houston State University. Allen is a co-founder of Forward Progressives and creator of the popular Right Off A Cliff column and Facebook page. Be sure to follow Allen on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to his channel on YouTube as well.

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