My Five Favorite Types of Republican Voter

redneck-voterBeing in this business, I’ve had countless debates with many types of Republicans.  Well, I say “many” based on the number of Republicans, not really the different types of Republicans.  Generally, each type says basically the same things.  The sad reality is all I have to do is turn on Fox News and/or listen to Rush Limbaugh and I pretty much know what your average conservative voter is going to say.

So I thought I’d list my 5 favorite types of Republican voter.

The Birther

We’ve all dealt with these.  The ones that honestly believe President Obama somehow faked a birth announcement and two different forms of his birth certificate.  Oh, and fooled every federal agency which conducts background checks on politicians.   Even though this myth has been debunked countless times, no amount of facts deters their belief that President Obama is a Kenyan, not an American.  They also seem to ignore the fact that his mother was an American, therefore making him an American.  These are also the people who seem to believe being Muslim is an ethnicity instead of a religion.

Ironically, these are also some of the biggest supporters of Texas Senator Ted Cruz — someone who was undoubtedly born in Canada.

The “Constitutionalist” Who Hates Our Constitution

These are the people who essentially cling to three parts of our Constitution:

  • Freedom of religion (though they interpret this as the freedom to force their religion on others)
  • Second Amendment gun rights
  • Tenth Amendment states rights

And even within their rabid support for these three areas, they tend to completely warp them for their own personal beliefs.  Freedom of religion really only means freedom of religion for their religion, no others.  If you don’t wish to follow a religion — too bad.  They want to interject religion into public policy and force it on you anyway.

With the Second Amendment, they completely ignore what life was like in the late-1700’s when armed militias were vital for the defense of our nation’s borders.  And they almost always ignore the entire first part that talks about the Second Amendment being meant for a “well regulated militia.”  To them, the term “well regulated” has no meaning in our Second Amendment.

Then the Tenth Amendment is almost always the argument used when conservative-controlled states seek to violate other parts of our Constitution.  It was the argument made by pro-slavery advocates, the argument made against desegregation and it’s the argument being made against giving same-sex couples equal rights.

These are also the people who often talk about how much they love our Constitution, until it doesn’t support what they want — then they’re the first ones to talk about secession.

Real “patriotic” of them.


The ones who seem to only believe that life exists inside of a womb.  Their only basis for being “pro-life” consists of an opposition to abortion (which is a Constitutionally-protected right as determined by our Supreme Court).  Yet, once that child is born, they’re also the same people supporting politicians who cut programs that help poor children get food and health care — all while pushing for deep cuts to education spending as well.

These are also some of the biggest pro-death penalty people, which is quite ironic.  Nothing quite like being “pro-life” while bragging about how often your state uses the death penalty.

Oh, and let’s not forget how quick they are to support sending our military to war, such as the war in Iraq where over 4,000 Americans died as well as tens of thousands of Iraqi civilians.

Like I said, the only time they’re “pro-life” is when you’re talking about an unborn fetus.  After it’s left the womb, “pro-life” goes right out the window.

Living on Government Assistance, While Judging Others Who Rely on Government Assistance

I always find it funny when I talk to someone who uses Medicare and lives off Social Security, then complains about how the government can’t do anything right and they don’t need the government in their lives.

You can go ahead and include the people who are on welfare, “because they’ve earned it,” while judging others who are on the same programs that they are as “lazy moochers” who need to get a job.

These are also the same people who fail to realize that public roads; Interstate Highways; public schools; traffic signals; our military; clean public water; safe food inspected by the FDA; the police department; the fire department and the FAA — all depend on the government.

You know, “socialism.”

The Republican Voter Who Blames Democrats for Problems Caused by Republicans

These are the people who believe President Obama has really added more to our national debt than every other president in United States history.  They’re also the ones who deny President Clinton balanced the budget, or give the credit to the Republican Congress — even though that same Republican Congress destroyed our budget as soon as Bush got into office.

They’re also the ones who believe President Obama was in office when the Great Recession began.  They also really believe our economy — despite adding 8 million jobs and having record-setting stock markets — has gotten worse under President Obama.  You know, the guy who took over in January of 2009 when we were losing hundreds of thousands of jobs every month. 

When deficits are mentioned, they tag Obama with the massive deficit we saw in 2009 — that was actually passed in 2008 under George W. Bush.

When nothing gets done in Washington, they don’t blame the House Republicans who refuse to vote on bipartisan pieces of legislation sent from the Senate, or the Senate Republicans who have set records for the use of the filibuster to obstruct progress in the Senate.  Nope — all the blame rests with President Obama and Democrats.

Who cares if Democrats control 2 of the 3 branches of government, Republicans should call all the shots, right?

These are also the people who seem to think elections don’t matter.  Who cares if Obama was overwhelmingly re-elected by the American people?  He should still do exactly what the minority in Washington wants him to do.

Then when Republicans refuse to compromise (“negotiating” is not asking for things that were deal breakers prior to negotiations, then complaining that the other side is unreasonable) it’s not Republicans who won’t compromise — it’s the Democrats.

I honestly could have listed many others, but I’ll go ahead and cut it off there.

But please, tell me I’m not alone here.  Have you dealt with these kinds of Republican voters?

Allen Clifton

Allen Clifton is a native Texan who now lives in the Austin area. He has a degree in Political Science from Sam Houston State University. Allen is a co-founder of Forward Progressives and creator of the popular Right Off A Cliff column and Facebook page. Be sure to follow Allen on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to his channel on YouTube as well.


Facebook comments