Stephen Colbert Brilliantly Mocks Fox News Fearmongering: ‘Obama Wants You to Line Up For a Calm and Orderly Death!’ (Video)

stephen-colbert-fox-news-ebolaAs most people know, Stephen Colbert is almost always in character. There have been a handful of times I’ve actually seen him not act as the character he portrays on his show The Colbert Report. But even then, if you watch his show enough, you can tell when particular topics have really ticked him off. Last night was one of those times.

In one of the best segments I’ve seen from him in a long time, Colbert absolutely tore into Fox News and other conservatives for their comments concerning the first case of Ebola here in the United States.

He started off by “apologizing” for his prediction last week that by now we’d all be dead because Ebola had made it to the United States. That “apology” led him into showing several clips of mostly Fox News hosts doing everything they can to build distrust toward the Center for Disease Control and ratchet up their Ebola fearmongering.

The most hilarious – and downright sad – part came when he showed Fox News personality Jeanine Pirro’s outrageous Ebola rant that can only be described as possibly the most absurd thing I’ve seen in a very long time.

Pirro more or less shouted, “White House spokesman Josh Earnest says that screening procedures are in place at our border and people are screened as soon as they get here. Really? You’re kidding, right? What’s that? You’re saying that because you don’t want people to panic? You don’t want us to panic? How about I don’t want us to die!”

Trust me when I say that you really just have to watch the video below to grasp the full absurdity of her comments. There she was trying to be dead serious, and all I could do was laugh.

Well, Colbert had the perfect response for Pirro’s nonsense.

“Yeah! Yeah! Obama wants you to line up for a calm and orderly death! What’s that? What’s that you’re saying? This is my deaf ear… and nobody’s talking? Then why am I hearing voices? Is that because of Ebola? What’s that? It’s an unrelated mental disorder? Alright then. As long as I don’t catch whatever paralyzed her eyebrows,” Colbert mocked.

He then went after former South Carolina GOP Director (and certified awful human being) Todd Kincannon, who tweeted out that the best way to save lives from Ebola – is to execute anyone who has Ebola.

Which led Colbert into an elaborate plan where the “chain of executions” leads all the way back to the original buffoon who suggested it.

The whole segment was excellent as he ripped into these individuals who seem more concerned with stirring up fear about Ebola rather than listening to the scientific experts who continue to tell Americans the facts about the disease.

Watch the segment below via Comedy Central:

Allen Clifton

Allen Clifton is a native Texan who now lives in the Austin area. He has a degree in Political Science from Sam Houston State University. Allen is a co-founder of Forward Progressives and creator of the popular Right Off A Cliff column and Facebook page. Be sure to follow Allen on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to his channel on YouTube as well.


Facebook comments

  • Justaguy

    And yet another video that’s unavailable from Australia .. “Curse you Murdoch, Curse you!!!!”

    • Steve Brains

      Does the Aussie government BAN lies on Aussie TV?

      • Justaguy

        They just allow Murdoch to basically have a monopoly on importing media into the country, and have sites such as hulu, netflix, the daily show and the colbert reports websites etc block streaming any media to an ip address from Australia. as that content is “not available in your country”. I guess you could say that if they are to busy denying climate change, and perpetuating human rights abuses to want anyone in the country to be able to watch anyone outside the country poke fun of us. Now remind me who that sounds like again?

      • Steve Brains

        Stalin and Mao. The Daily Show and Colbert are on your side. they want justice and equal representative government for everyone, not just Americans.

        WHY are they supporting Murdoch AFTER they tossed him out of Australia again? I was never clear on that.

      • Justaguy

        They didn’t toss him out of Australia. He just went where it’s easier to brainwash the masses. And your Stalin/Mao parallel is extremely dicey at best. Are you saying that wanting good things for those that are not Americans is a bad thing? That Americans are some sort of Master Race? There’s another guy that I could throw into your mix if that’s the case.

      • Steve Brains

        I was respond in to :

        “I guess you could say that if they are to busy denying climate change, and perpetuating human rights abuses to want anyone in the country to be able to watch anyone outside the country poke fun of us. Now remind me who that sounds like again?”

        Propaganda and complete fabrication of indoctrinational history was the hallmark of BOTH those 2.

      • Justaguy

        It’s also the hallmark of just about every government before or after them. Or do you still think the Americans are why the Germans lost WW2?

    • KraN McC

      “Proxmate” or “Hola Unblocker” allow you to view any videos, anywhere.

      • Justaguy

        Which is technically bypassing an existing law in your country and hence illegal for us. So our options are break the law or don’t watch it.

      • KraN McC

        Technically it is America refusing to share with us so I ain’t breaking any laws in my country…nor would you be… otherwise it would be illegal to use, promote or supply said product within said country…which it is not.

      • Justaguy

        Actually they hashed this out awhile back. It is illegal for you to access that content from your country. America is complying with that request from your countries authorities, and you are circumventing that compliance. Thus breaking the law in your cuntry. (spelling intentional)

  • Kelly McCosh Wosahla

    Shit was funny, until you see the tweet at around 3:35…oh my hell.

    • Cemetery Girl

      Colbert’s plan based on his tweet was good though. I am not surprised though. The plan seems to be to work people into a panic, and get a few to turn Carol from Walking Dead. Once there is a panic induced murder then Fox will be able to say that not nearly enough was done to avoid panic and enstill confidence in containment and control of Ebola and now people are killing possibly contaminated people. They will question how Obama could have let the people become so frightened they are actually murdering people possibly infected.

      • Steve Brains

        Perfectly Republicans, like the lynchings and civil rights murders in good Old Dixie.

      • Andy Kinnard

        They are already blaming the hysteria that they’ve encouraged on generalized distrust in the Obama administration which they not only encouraged but largely built up from big piles of nothing. It’s a crazy, crazy, crazy dismemberment of logic.

  • barbaralee12

    It seems this is driving them over the cliff.This is so funny how they are letting this eat them up.

    • Steve Brains

      Let ’em fall on their own pitards.

  • crabjack

    These are really sick “people” that spread their vile, hateful fear on Fox “news”. My head hurts when these fools open their mouths. Funny, cigarettes kill thousands of times more Americans than Ebola ever will. Heck, Monsanto products cause more damage than Ebola. I don’t hear these hate pundits say anything about that.

    • dur

      Because Monsanto funds them….

  • Macdoodle

    Ebola can be spread through airborne particles.A sneeze, a cough.Animals caged in the same room have transmitted the disease to each other even though they have had no direct contact.Wake up fools.The CDC does not want to start a panic.Imagine what would happen to our economy, the stock market, if people suddenly panic and avoided going out into public and spending money for fear of mixing with others who might be infected.The market reacted significantly the day the Dallas incident was announced.

    • mandate

      And your credentials as an ebola expert come from where?

      • Steve Brains

        Fox and Limbaugh, of course!!!

      • gian keys LOVES shemale porn

        he had the mumps as a kid

    • JoeNCA

      I’m not so much concerned about Ebola as I am from scientifically illiterate fools panicking such as yourself.

    • Josh Harasty

      You know jack shit about infectious control. Particles from sneezing and coughing are not considered airborne. they are considered droplets. That fits right along with what doctors have known about Ebola. That it can only be transmitted by body fluids such as blood, urine and sputum.

      • Steve Brains

        So unless he was sucking snot (or other male specific viscous gel like substance) he’d be perfectly safe.

        of course a 10 cent MASK would save him if he lived in Liberia.

        But then again, unless he breaks in to the Texas Presbyterian hospital, finds the quarantined room, gets past security, unzips that reporter or kisses him on the mouth… he CAN NOT get it with out a passport and a plane ticket to.. LIBERIA!!

        WHAT Texan in it’s right mind would travel to the DARKEST of Africa where he is outnumbered 30-1 by GENUINE, 100% pure bred (not half whites like the President) Africans just to get a check from Fox news for LYING about how he got infected.

    • DC

      Animals live in cages and piss and shit everywhere. Those particles can be kicked up & spread through the air/between cages. Zzz it’s not airborne. I’m tired of seeing that. It’s not true and it’s just going to cause people to worry.

      Stay away from sick people and take care of yourself & you’ve got nothing to worry about 🙂

      • Steve Brains

        At Dolly Parton’s Stampede, you get fed Game hens and fixin’s, which you eat with your fingers (NO UTENILS AT ALL), while buffalo horses and pigs are rampaging 10 feet below you in the dark brown lumpy sawdust.

        THe tennessee and missouri health departments find this kind of fun COMPLETELY SANITARY. Which means even ebola infected pigs shitting in the ring and kicking up the fresh PARTICLES would be SAFE.

    • Steve Brains

      But it HAS to be a 98.6 degree BODILY FLUID I QUANTITY. You oul need spit in your eyes, piss in your mouth, or sperm n your ass to get enough to fester.

      The quantity has to OVERPOWER your immune system. A mainlining heron addict like you probably has weaker immunity that a full blown AIDS victim. But even so, catching it right away and mega drug therapies have cured THOUSANDS.

      I sure hope you are one of those Macho Texassholes who refuses to go to a doctor because you are “too much of a man.”

    • Saaby000

      I’m so glad there is someone else in the country that knows the truth. Was it revealed to you in a vision like it was to me?

      • gian keys LOVES shemale porn

        he fell and hit his head on the porcelain commode

      • Saaby000

        If you say so.

    • Jen

      Hey, remember that one time, when the bird flu was suppose to wipe out a quarter of the world’s population? That turned out as epic as FOX wanted us to believe….not.

    • RichieRich2014

      I wonder if those who made fun of you (below) have a different point of view now that a nurse has been identified as having contracted it.

      • indybeckih

        It’s December 2014, two months after your post, said nurse is ebola-free and healthy, and the new ebola cases haven’t ramped up. Of course, I suppose you think that’s because the “liberal media” squashes the reports.

  • Dureall Ramsdell

    I understand this is not available in Canada, but you do not have to be a total; dick about it. It is NOT because of our overly polite attitudes, So just stop with the bullshit.

  • gian keys LOVES shemale porn

    VOTE REEEEEEEEEE—PUBLICAN!!!! they LOVE ( white aging regressive religious) AMERICA!!!
    FOX “news”??? Hmmmmmm– hows that bengahzi thing doin’4 ya’?

    • Ivan Renko

      Dude, broken record, much?

      Why do you think the 1,000th time you repeat something is going to have a different reaction than the 999th time you say it?

      You’re like my little terrier puppy barking out the window at people walking down the street. Like you, he also thinks he has an effect on people who don’t react to him.

      • gian keys LOVES shemale porn

        I make triple peppercorn brandy bordelaise the same way– 999 times in a row.
        why would I alter that which ( a) is accurate (b) is a wonderful satire of how I view things (c) brings wood worms such as U out to eat?
        care to discuss any more sports ? or perhaps your land locked area U “live” in? ,,,, maybe your OBVIOUS lack of knowledge regarding time/space ( see: NOW) physics-?
        well; I will keep it civil- lets banter about JOB creation!
        you 20 yrs; I get 14– a 10 to 7 ratio favoring U!
        >you get Reagan /bush1 / bush 2
        >I get Clinton and obama
        ok! that was fun- now let us move to deficits and spending- we can imbue such arcane measures as PCT% of GDP/ pct% of population ( see: per capita) / PCT% in relation to PRIOR administrations deficits( or surpluses)….. maybe just flat out DEFICITS?
        ” please continue; govna”

      • gian keys LOVES shemale porn

        hey sh*tbag,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,U didn’t like playing with FACTS???
        awww,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, seem IVAN the RENKO “he faw down an’ go boom again”
        please spin back and lets talk about something non sequitur; such as the dangers of placing photos on this blog or maybe a thesaurus?

      • Ivan Renko

        How about let’s not.

  • Steve Brains

    I saw this masterpiece last night. He was spot on and even hit the perfect timing. We all have to EXPOSE the rED Menace fear mongering at every opportunity. It’s likethe Bible where Jesus says to NOt strike back, but turn your cheek “7 times 70”.

    The shame of slapping an passive man grows with every insulting hit because you r anger can’t be raised.

    Only with the REDS, we need to spit in their eye and piss in their scotch every time they LIE.

  • Gary Brumley

    interruption on this makes hearing Colbert impossble I paying money for these scum garbage liberal idiots…internet is commiting suicide here